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I see the Past.I Live the Present.I Relieve the Future

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Thursday, June 19, 2014

Mystery or Creepy

Havent been able to sleep well. After since had this creepy thing going on. 
Scary enough!! Had this sub concious situation, where i was about to sleep off, this sudden long finger nails touching my hand. I usually gets really angry when this kind of thing disturbing. So i was saying in my half sleep to go away. However it didnt stop, the moment i shout at it, i was awaken in a dream. In that dream i walk out from my bedroom, and reaching from behind to switch on the lights; that long finger pulled me back....i was so afraid and i manage to wakeup reality!!! I couldnt sleep till 5am. 

It has been 4 years, i hadnt felt so afraid to sleep in my bedroom. 

On the next night, i was closing my eyes to sleep & i saw this shadow linger around my face. I tell myself not to open my eyes & simply ignore but i had the tapping from my left shoulder. I keep on ignoring it. 

A friend of mine told me as he can see this thing, theres something lingering around me.

I knew, i felt something not right after since what happened, but in denial of this crap. 

Whoever you are, i'm living my life just like everyone else. If i have taken something that doesnt belong to me. I'm sorry, but at least let me know...its not mine to take if its belong to you. 

Dear Almighty, what test is this, i hope i can get thru all of it, but please protect my family and myself from it too. Theres noone more greater than you to prevent this thing, as i am a weak human. I would wish this thing to back fired but i wouldnt cause i am neither the same as them. I've given a heart to be very compassionate and a brain to think wisely.

 Cruelty doesnt solve anything. 

Monday, June 9, 2014

Guts, Hate, Want you

Totally how i felt for you at the moment.
Had been away from phone whatsapp last week. Away from Mr Arrogant with Guts i hate.😤 However he text me, wondering where i have been. Was literally feeling overwhelm that he's looking for me after i kinda quietly silence myself from him as he not knowing my reason is. But then still doesnt change, i'll be the one who will always drop by to text saying Hi, teasing things after the next day. 😒 And i'm doing it again, away from him after a conversation, i was asking him the color perfume i gave him birthday gift last year. He said Did i gave him a gift?? At first i Thought he was teasing me. I said i did gave him. And his respond was Ooh...anyway goodnight, had to be early tomorrow morning. I ended the conversation with WHATEVER!!!

I hate that!!! Everytime i asked him something randomly, he wouldnt give me any answers!! 😡😠
I hate him, hate his guts but want him so much...

I questions things, what did i do to be treated like this? To be treated by a person i have feelings. 
As always when we were a couple, i tend to say I am a Nobody to you. Yet it still doesnt change, till today no longer together, I'm still  nobody special in his life. 😓

I'm tired.....having feelings for somebody who doesnt care. But i'm still heading to him put up with his crap or whatever he do. 

Easier said than done. I wish i can simply walk away, go away, run away from this feelings, tangled...