Dear, You - Mr AngeL

There i say it!!! 

 

Return & Away

Feeling bummed this few months. Well, i finally doing ok ever since the Mystery/Creepy thing in my room. Feeling better & look better! Hoping not to go through that again anymore! Pray to Almighty!  

With the dream i had this past few days, it made me thinking so much! I believe in dreams unless its something out of ordinary i might said i got carried away by it *peace*. I hardly had a dream when sleeping, so when i dream...it tells me something perhaps an answer i'm looking for; though most of it are like puzzles. I had to figure it out. I'll be get back to that in another blog post. *chill*

Anyhoo.....I was ranting my tantrums of the Return & Away. Posted a random/intentionally on my fb yesterday night and waking up early because a fan i followed on Younow is online live, Had to hear him singing *giggles*

Saw notification fb pop on my ipad, checked it and i saw Angel (likes). I guess that caught his attention! Mixed emotion all the way!! OMG!! OMG!! Blushing, giggling, shy. At the same time, i had this feeling I didn't wanna see his fb post, cause my emotion will turn from Way Up then down to ZERO - NIL - NADA, and typically blunt of me i check it out...and yup...Not knowing what is going on, what is he going through....Feeling so distant, feeling aloof *tears*

Though i feel down when i see the post,...i feel a LiL Happy seeing the updates, knowing you are still in one piece :p

Dear Angel, the pictures says how much i wanted to be there for you. I guess i will just be Dreaming away....

Mystery or Creepy

Havent been able to sleep well. After since had this creepy thing going on. 

Scary enough!! Had this sub concious situation, where i was about to sleep off, this sudden long finger nails touching my hand. I usually gets really angry when this kind of thing disturbing. So i was saying in my half sleep to go away. However it didnt stop, the moment i shout at it, i was awaken in a dream. In that dream i walk out from my bedroom, and reaching from behind to switch on the lights; that long finger pulled me back....i was so afraid and i manage to wakeup reality!!! I couldnt sleep till 5am. 

It has been 4 years, i hadnt felt so afraid to sleep in my bedroom. 

On the next night, i was closing my eyes to sleep & i saw this shadow linger around my face. I tell myself not to open my eyes & simply ignore but i had the tapping from my left shoulder. I keep on ignoring it. 

A friend of mine told me as he can see this thing, theres something lingering around me.

I knew, i felt something not right after since what happened, but in denial of this crap. 

Whoever you are, i'm living my life just like everyone else. If i have taken something that doesnt belong to me. I'm sorry, but at least let me know...its not mine to take if its belong to you. 

Dear Almighty, what test is this, i hope i can get thru all of it, but please protect my family and myself from it too. Theres noone more greater than you to prevent this thing, as i am a weak human. I would wish this thing to back fired but i wouldnt cause i am neither the same as them. I've given a heart to be very compassionate and a brain to think wisely.

 Cruelty doesnt solve anything. 

Just for sharing

Guts, Hate, Want you

Totally how i felt for you at the moment.

Had been away from phone whatsapp last week. Away from Mr Arrogant with Guts i hate.😤 However he text me, wondering where i have been. Was literally feeling overwhelm that he's looking for me after i kinda quietly silence myself from him as he not knowing my reason is. But then still doesnt change, i'll be the one who will always drop by to text saying Hi, teasing things after the next day. 😒 And i'm doing it again, away from him after a conversation, i was asking him the color perfume i gave him birthday gift last year. He said Did i gave him a gift?? At first i Thought he was teasing me. I said i did gave him. And his respond was Ooh...anyway goodnight, had to be early tomorrow morning. I ended the conversation with WHATEVER!!!

I hate that!!! Everytime i asked him something randomly, he wouldnt give me any answers!! 😡😠

I hate him, hate his guts but want him so much...

I questions things, what did i do to be treated like this? To be treated by a person i have feelings. 

As always when we were a couple, i tend to say I am a Nobody to you. Yet it still doesnt change, till today no longer together, I'm still  nobody special in his life. 😓

I'm tired.....having feelings for somebody who doesnt care. But i'm still heading to him put up with his crap or whatever he do. 

Easier said than done. I wish i can simply walk away, go away, run away from this feelings, tangled...

Night

Spending the night with him, Mr Arrogant(Ex).😝 I guess, not its not a guess, i'll say he's the only guy i have been seeing this 3 years after my last relation in 2010. I seriously dont know where or what relation we are having. Its like this song goes 🎶Somedays you would Love me then you dont, then you do, then you wont, then you're here, then you're gone, i'm alone, you got me stressing on the floor🎶 

I did give it a thought to date other guy but i feel so insecure in terms, i dont trust people nowdays. Oh lordy, how am i gonna get thru this....😩 Its really depressing!

Although, Mr Arrogant being arrogant at some point he expressed his feeling while i am asleep, in which i happen to hear it. But when i'm consciously awake, he tends to be very cocky. urrgghhh 😒 I do know the feelings i have for him is still there deep down in my heart, however i do have this special feelings for Mr Angel 😓. I'm so making myself Tangled!! 

I wish Almighty hear me out, what am i going to do with this 2 people. Mr Arrogant whom i have relation, still seeing each other till today n which i'm not sure the outcome. Mr Angel whom i secretly develop feelings in which have never meet in person just his Tantrums, will there be any chance?

Missing You Mr Angel

No Matter where you are...I still Like you....Will always Do. I don't really know much about you, somehow the feelings i have for you are real.

Mr Angel JxxBxx